Cheers and Jeers: Wednesday

“Youngsters’s Hospital in New York is kind of an incredible place.  On a current go to, I noticed two seven-year-olds performing a kidney transplant.”

“They at all times say the vice chairman is only a heartbeat away from the presidency. Don’t they imply the lack of a heartbeat?”

“Individuals who see life as something aside from pure leisure are lacking the purpose.”

There is a message window that comes up on my pc display screen at any time when I kind a command the pc doesn’t like. It says, “Fuck you, I don’t do this.”

“In relation to God’s existence, I am not an atheist and I am not an agnostic. I am an acrostic. I am puzzled by the entire thing.”

“Stick round. China‘s gonna win all of it.”

And when you’ve got time, sit again for ten minutes and recognize the sheer preparation and apply required to drag off his legendary (and NSFW) set about these 7 well-known phrases. Like a vuvuzela to the ears of the Puritan.

And now, our characteristic presentation…

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Cheers and Jeers for Wednesday, June 22, 2022

Be aware: Whoever changed my entrenched narrative with recent perspective has 24 hours to modify it again or I am calling the correct authorities.

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By the Numbers:

Days ’til autumn: 90

Days ’til Zoobilee! Feast with the Beasts in Windfall, RI: 3

Weeks ’til the anticipated re-opening of Yosemite Nationwide Park after the flooding there: 2

Acres of land within the U.S. which have burned attributable to wildfires to date this 12 months: 3 million

% likelihood that the Maine oyster catch set an all-time report final 12 months, value $10 million versus simply $1.3 million in 2011: 100%

Variety of hikers who died Sunday in New Hampshire close to Mount Washington amid snow and 80 mph winds: 1

Remaining bid to have the final “charity lunch” with Warren Buffett by way of eBay public sale: $19 million

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Mid-week Rapture Index: 188 (together with 5 gogs and 1 recitation of the Republican Prayer). Soul Safety Issue 24 lotion is beneficial if you happen to’ll be strolling amongst the heathen at the moment.

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Pet Pic of the Day:  Wow.

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CHEERS to Day 4. Extra outstanding testimony yesterday on the Home Jan. 6 Subcommittee hearings. Far be it from me to depend on Fox Information for my instantaneous evaluation, however every so often you simply gotta make an exception:

Cliffs Notes model: Trump did crimey stuff in Georgia and Arizona to try to steal the 2020 election, and in so doing he put the native and state elections officers by means of a dwelling nightmare of dying threats, break-ins, and different assorted terrorism by his brain-dead cult. And the place was our illustrious Legal professional Basic Merrick Garland yesterday? Lecturing Ukrainians on learn how to correctly punish those that commit struggle crimes. Hilarious, isn’t it? No, not you…I am asking George W. Bush and Dick Cheney.

CHEERS to transferring left. Aborrajados for everybody! There’s unhealthy information for the conservative horde, seeing as Colombia held elections final weekend and made just a little historical past:

Leftist Gustavo Petro, a former member of the M-19 guerrilla motion who has vowed profound social and financial change, gained Colombia’s presidency on Sunday, the primary progressive to take action within the nation’s historical past.

Petro, a former mayor of capital Bogota and present senator, has pledged to battle inequality with free college schooling, pension reforms and excessive taxes on unproductive land. He gained 50.5% to Hernandez’s 47.3%. […]

Petro’s working mate Francia Marquez, a single mom and former housekeeper, would be the nation’s first Afro-Colombian lady vice-president. “At this time I’m voting for my daughter —she turned 15 two weeks in the past and requested for only one reward: that I vote for Petro,” mentioned safety guard Pedro Vargas, 48, in Bogota’s southwest on Sunday morning.

Good luck to the Petro-Marquez administration. However hold your eye on senators Jose Manchino and Kyrstentita Sinemandra. They seem like bother.

CHEERS to supporting the troops. 78 years in the past at the moment, President Roosevelt—he of the super-awesome Democratic Celebration—signed the G.I. Invoice of Rights:

Though World Struggle II was removed from over, FDR was decided to plan forward for a clean transition to peace, each overseas and at residence.

The President proposed to Congress a method to stage the financial affect of the struggle’s finish and to combine returning veterans again into American society.

The end result was the GI Invoice.

Now broadly credited with creating the post-war center class, the GI Invoice of Rights supplied returning veterans with instructional advantages, work coaching, hiring preferences, and sponsored loans for purchasing properties, companies and farms. It continues at the moment to be one of many lasting legacies of the Roosevelt administration.

It rewarded servicemen for his or her sacrifices with low-cost loans, instructional subsidies and different advantages.  Sort of like what our forty third president (bear in mind him?) needed to do for servicemembers throughout his wartime presidency…minus the low-cost loans, instructional subsidies and different advantages. (However double the deployments!)

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BRIEF SANITY BREAK

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END BRIEF SANITY BREAK

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CHEERS to being born! A hearty “Blissful Birthday and lots of blessings in your camels” to Massachusetts Senator Elizabeth Warren, who turns [hffrrhffrrhrrr] at the moment. Republicans fought tooth and nail to maintain her from getting elected to the seat as soon as occupied by the mighty Ted Kennedy, and it is simple to see why: her brains, widespread sense and willingness to reveal the banksters and Trumpbots because the scum-sucking vampire squids they’re have made her the ideological North Star for the Democratic celebration and an enormous swath of independents.

Our official C&J birthday reward to Senator Warren, as she continues her battle in opposition to the Republican forces of evil: a brand new pair of footwear with spikes within the toes. (Use them for good, ma’am. Just for good.)

JEERS to punishment by way of dumbstick.  After which there’s this little little bit of scientific wankery, courtesy of the Catholic Church (the American department of which is now attempting to disclaim President Biden communion for not being Republican sufficient).  On June 22, 1633, Galileo Galilei was advised that he needed to “abjure, curse, and detest” his view that the earth revolved across the solar.  Let’s assessment the church’s decree, lets?

The proposition that the Solar is the middle of the world and doesn’t transfer from its place is absurd and false philosophically and formally heretical, as a result of it’s expressly opposite to Holy Scripture.

The proposition that the Earth is just not the middle of the world and immovable however that it strikes, and in addition with a diurnal movement, is equally absurd and false philosophically and theologically thought-about a minimum of faulty in religion.

It took the Vatican over 350 years to confess their heads revolved round their asses. However they’d an excellent motive why: they have been, like, y’know, busy with stuff.

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Ten years in the past in C&J: June 22, 2012

JEERS to untruth in promoting. The leaders of an Alaska militia group have been convicted this week on a number of counts of thuggery, together with the tried assassination of presidency officers. They warned of blood working within the streets, actively known as for the upcoming fall of america authorities, and by no means met a firearm they didn’t like. The title they selected to encapsulate their group’s violent targets: the Alaska Peacemakers. I like their new title higher: the Alaska License Plate Makers.

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And only one extra…

CHEERS to remembering the “Nice Sitstorm” of Aught Sixteen. Cannot let the week squeak by with out slipping into the wayback machine to recollect the day we found that Democrats may stage a sit-down protest on the ground of the Home, disrupting enterprise and throwing the Republican majority right into a tizzy. However there wasn’t a factor they may do about it, partly as a result of the chief of the resistance was a dwelling American icon: 

Led by civil rights icon Rep. John Lewis (D-GA), Democratic members of Congress actually sat on the Home ground on Wednesday to demand motion on gun management. Speaker Paul Ryan (R-WI) responded by ordering the cameras off and abruptly ending the session.

“We now have misplaced lots of of hundreds of harmless individuals to gun violence,” Lewis mentioned on the Home ground throughout Wednesday’s morning session.

Dozens of Democratic members of Congress stood beside him, earlier than all of them took a seat on the ground.

“Tiny little kids. Infants, college students, and academics. Moms and dads. Sisters and brothers. Daughters and sons. Buddies and neighbors,” Lewis mentioned. “And what has this physique executed?”

Watch him thunder and pound the lectern in righteous indignation on the Home ground along with his Democratic colleagues standing behind him. Indelible second:

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And they also actually sat on the ground of the Home, a lot to the delight of Individuals sick and uninterested in gun violence, however to the chagrin of the congress members’ backsides. No one anticipated Republicans to do something constructive in response, nevertheless it achieved Lewis’s purpose of “making some noise” and getting Individuals to note which celebration is looking for them.  On that rating: level Democrats.

Have a cheerful humpday. Ground’s open…What are you cheering and jeering about at the moment?

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At this time’s Shameless C&J Testimonial

If Invoice in Portland Maine is calling, let it go to voicemail

—Vox

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